If...

If my child napped for more than 30-45 minutes on a regular basis, then I could work on my (his) photo album.

If I was more tech savvy, I would download and/or upload some precious video clips to share with family and friends.

If I had more patience with computers, I would figure out how to do the above (can't be that difficult...)

If the attic access wasn't in Keller's room, I would start sorting through/disposing of some teacher stuff when he naps.  Ugh!  There's lots of it!

If I was better at being a friend, I would actually call the people I like:)

If I was a better housewife, I'd have a healthy dinner on the table when my husband came home from work.

If I had more confidence, then I wouldn't pester myself about these things...

Shoulds:

I should exercise more.

I should do a better job organizing my photos.

I should actually order the rest of the prints (the pictures I've taken since Christmas...ugh!)

I should be better about writing down Keller's milestones.

I should visit my family more often.

I should visit my friends more often.

We should get new front steps.

We should paint the window trim.

We should clean the basement.

We should clean the attic.

We should touch up the interior trim.

We should get the house all set and ready to be put on the market...

just in case.

We should just live where we live and enjoy the moment.

If I wasn't planning on having another child eventually, I wouldn't feel the need to move to a bigger house yet.

Affirmations;)

I'm a good mommy.

I'm a good wife.

I'm an okay friend.

I'm in pretty good shape.

I have a cozy and comfortable home.

I am lucky enough to get to stay home with my boy.

I absolutely love watching Keller's cuteness every day even if it's not captured on film.  Those moments will more importantly be imprinted in my heart.

Keller doesn't care how big his house is (neither do I...unless there's a next kid in which case I'd only just want a next room)

I have a loving and patient husband.

I have a wonderful family.

I have a wonderful family-in-law.

I am healthy.

My family is healthy.

I should quit my iffin and should'n and just be in the now!

If only it were that easy!!

Not Much!

Oh, no!  I still haven't done the official 10 month pictures...why not?  So here are some of Keller engaging in his favorite pastimes:) What more pressing things have I to do?  It just amazes me how "the less I do, the less I do" as my sister-in-law once said:)  But I'm very busy, you see...  Actually, at the moment, I'm awaiting Keller's wake up from his nap so that we can hop in the car and head to a possible "employer."  I responded to a Craigs List ad looking for a babysitter for 7-9 days a month....so 3 or 4 days every other week for 3.5 and 5.5 year old kids, one of whom will be in school most of the day and the other doing a few mornings a week.  Hopefully it will be a good fit and it sounds like I'll still have every other week completely free.  I liked the idea of being able to be with Keller and still manage to get paid a little bit to share my time and actually, when I watched my sister's kids, I was less distracted and more "present" to Keller (and Cali and Chase) because I wasn't home doing important things on the computer (Craigs List, Realtor.com, etc...)  So we'll see what happens.  While I've been checking craigs list periodically for awhile now, the kicker came when I sat down to really take a look at our expenses as we having been tossing about the idea of a new house (meeting with the bank tomorrow for pre-approval...yikes!)  And granted, we're "fine" financially as long as we keep things tight, I think it's just a personal thing to feel like I'm contributing just a little, not to mention that I wouldn't mind some sense of structure to some of my time (emphasis on the "some-s").  So we'll see.  Oh, then there's the Open House we went to last weekend which maybe was a great big "Hmmmm...I could live there" kind of thing....  So we've been busy in our own little way I guess:)

10 Months!

Where did that month go??  Crazy how time just passes on by...  We're doing good around here, hanging around mostly and squeezing in some visits and "Mom Group" events (well a Tuesday walk is about all we're into just yet), walking Gramma D's dog, walking BoBo, and just getting started on using the new jogging stroller (too hot the past few days though--not an excuse but a safety precaution;)  Keller had a sleepover at my parents' house on Sunday night so Trav and I could go up to see Dar Williams at this cute little theater way up in Norfolk, CT, AND she even played my song that I told Trav to remind me to tell Keller that will be the song that I dance with him to at his wedding (Trav says I don't get to pick the song though), so I had leaky eyes for a little bit at the show but mostly a smile and a tapping foot in our front row seat...very close--I never had a front row seat before:)  What else, Keller's talking up a storm, crawling all around, opening and closing drawers and cabinets and doors, and the newest is putting little things in different places...dishclothes and toys in the drawer under the oven, little plastic bugs in his Aunt Shannon's dog's bowl, Ducky in the soap dish in the tub... and he knows where the O's and Puffed Wheat cereal is and will open the cabinet, take them out and do his "ehhhhh, ehhhhh, ehhhhhh (I want some)" whine or sometimes if he shakes the bag or box just right, a few come out and he (and Bo) get a little bonus snack!  Yes, he and Bo are certainly going to be a tag-team...He's taking his morning nap now, it's 9:30 and he's been asleep for almost an hour and was only awake for an hour and a half before taking his nap...weird, but hey, a nap is a nap..I'll take it!  When he wakes up I'll snap his 10 month pictures before we head off to visit his Bee Bee and Papa (Trav's parents)...

As for me, I've been trying to be in contact with a tutoring agency/woman though we're having trouble connecting...I think she's on vacation (I hope) which is why I haven't heard back from her after she emailed to follow up...it's hard to coordinate a time to be reached during business hours when you don't have a set napping schedule...I'd hate for her to call and me to be so distracted by Keller dumping out the dog bowl or climbing on the bongo drums (no, he'd never do that) or trying to play with electric cords...so either she'll be understanding of that or else she'll let me call when he's asleep.  Or I let go of this feeling like I "should" be trying to make a little money and just relax and enjoy being home with Keller (as I'm doing)...but anyway...it would be good to do tutoring for the mere benefit of staying in the loop and in the lingo of teaching...I've already come across this reading methodology which seems fairly popular in the tutoring circles that I've heard nothing about...I'm considering buying the "parent resource guide" and using that to do my own tutoring from...hmmmm...who knows!  I just get these ideas and feel like I should try them...

I'm off to ready myself for the day before the boy wakes up!  Be back with pictures...eventually:)

Long Lost Friend

Well after 19 months, my long lost friend has arrived and at no more predictable of a day than that of a full moon.  That answers my wonderings as to whether things got messed up during surgery!  I somehow didn't miss her, but I guess she's good to have around, particularly to help with any possible "event planning" in the future!  (yes future, meaning not right now!)  I hope the moon helps out Becky today too!!